 © Shane Reiswig
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Race, Chocolate, and Dogs Click to read Click to |
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© Shane Reiswig
|
Race, Chocolate, and Dogs Click to read Click to |
Race,
Chocolate, and Dogs
People don’t tell the truth, and the world is a poorer place because of it. I
could introduce myself by saying that I am a white person, and I do check the box marked
"white" on standardized forms, yet that would be a lie. The truth is that white
people are tan, not white, and black people are brown, not black. Everyone else is a
related earthtone. I am called "white" in a social system which polarizes us
"whiteys" from everyone else.
Another set of lies relates to size. I am thin (5'10", 152 pounds), used to be skinny (130 pounds), but no one told me to my face that I was skinny, for fear of hurting me. My partner Judith is fat (5'7", 280 pounds), but she is referred to as "big-boned," or "big," or "hefty"—sometimes zoftig, a Yiddish term which alludes to large breasts, a misnomer here. Her personal favorite is "queen-sized." She tells me that she is past "pleasingly plump" and "a good eater," though these terms are still occasionally applied by people who are baffled, uncomfortable, or have limited vision or vocabularies.
People will tell me that my added weight looks good on me, but the only comments that Judith hears about her size have to do with the difficulty of finding nice clothes that fit (from other fat women) or condolences on failed diets (from thin women). Invisibility can be more painful that facing difficult things about ourselves.
Humans are capable of assessing and naming objects as they are. We don’t need euphemisms and polarities. We are capable of telling it like it is. Think of how we refer to animals. People don’t say: "Look at that pleasingly plump dog." Instead, they say, "Look at that old dog. Her teats drag on the ground. Isn’t she cute? Here, girl!"
People also don’t say: "See that dog of color? He’s got dark spots." Rather, they say, "Check out that tan dog with the black and brown patches." Dog colors come out of the Crayola box. Human colors come out of an imaginary box devised for white superiority (black is evil, white good) and maintained out of fear of other people and anxiety about change. I don’t mean to transform well-intentioned euphemisms born of respect into bigoted, pithy epithets or vice versa. Nor am I aiming at bringing private honesty into the public forum before society is ready. (If you called my lover "a fatty with saggy tits," she probably would be offended; though, with reconsideration and in the face of sincere attitude, she might appreciate the refreshing honesty.) I’m hoping that we all can nourish the ability to accurately perceive. Though I’m thin and white and speaking for myself and other folks who might be like me, these phenomena extend to everyone. Apply these analogies to height, disability, Jewishness, gender, gayness or any other "difference" from the North American-white-Christian-right-handed-heterosexual-male gold standard, and you’ll see what I mean.
I don’t pretend to have a solution to the world’s economic and political conflicts. I believe that, if we humans express what we perceive without the distortions dictated by custom, then humankind and the world will be better off.
How about starting with "race by chocolate"? Here’s what I mean. Chocolate is a common denominator. Most people can relate to it without prejudice. For example: One of my black friends has skin which is the color of milk chocolate; another is more bittersweet. My own skin color is a mix of white chocolate (which really is white!) and milk chocolate, because my ancestry is Eastern European Jew which happens, in me, to be darker than a person whose heritage is Western European, and lighter than a person whose heritage is African.
My theory is that telling the truth gives us a head start on doing what we actually want in the world. If we begin by naming what is around us the way children do: fat, thin, sort of thin (kids don’t use polarities much) or taupe, red clay, caramel, mocha, then perhaps we’ll end up by being able to identify true things within us. And then we may find that we connect better with other people.
Profile
Though busy with her hospital rotations, Laura not only made all the phone calls necessary to set up the gig for the singer- songwriter Tret Fure, she also interviewed the artist for the local feminist newspaper, the now-defunct Common Ground. Unwittingly, Laura’s actions in producing the concert also pulled together the disparate factions in the small town, who were all present; her speech had to address each group’s concern without seeming to make too much effort in doing so. She did it with humor, sagacity, and presence.
Her current writing brings me back to that smoky club in upstate New York where Laura and I lived in independent unhappiness. That first concert-related interview showed Laura a niche—women’s music production. The writing she has done since has made her something of a celebrity in women’s music. After moving to California, still in love with words and questions, she splits her time between writing about the arts, sports, cultural events, and working with mentally ill addicts in Oakland.
—Judith Avery
Bio
Laura L. Post
Place of residence: Oakland.
Birthplace: New York City.
Grew up in: Manhattan and Los Angeles.
Day jobs: Psychiatrist. Educator.
Education: B.A., Harvard University. M.A., Université de Paris IV. M.D., State
University of New York, Buffalo.
Serial publications: Ms.Out. Deneuve. Advocate. Outlines. Washington Blade.
B-Side. Spirit/Southwest Airlines, and over 150 other
publications—fiction, poetry, features, columns, and reviews.
How I describe myself: A left-handed, Jewish writer of mixed-class heritage.
Awards: First Class Girl Scout. First prize, 1995 Arizona Authors Contest for an
essay on lesbian battering. Best Journalist, Hot Wire: The Journal of Music and Culture
(1992).
Current projects: Collection of feminist interviews with women musicians,
forthcoming from New Victoria Press (1997). Lady Phoenix Productions—educational
seminars.
Favorite book: Stone City by Mitchell Smith.
Beliefs: I am a person in recovery, and I try to be present and mindful.
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